Nightshopper's MTT & SNG Challenge

[GR1ZZL3R]

Don't beat yourself up too much @nightshopper Patience will come with practice hopefully, it seems to have done for me. Nice results. 😃

[P0kerM0nk]

Funny how we sometimes try to force the game but we all know that this doesn't work lol. And even more important that you can identify your own bad habits as this is also an important step towards progression within your game and as a more complete poker player. Nice profits.

[nightshopper]

Thanks guys. I guess this bad habit is hard to understand for people who never play the game, whereas you guys clearly recognize the feeling and the behaviour. While writing this I just came up with an idea. At the moment I'm doing a challenge in order to get rid of some bad habits in daily life, when it comes to unhealthy food, alcohol and smoking. It started April 19th. From that day the challenge is that I can't eat 'garbage food', drink alcohol or smoke in the evenings, for a month. When it comes to smoking that means I don't smoke at all, since I only smoke when I drink alcohol 😇 So let's do a challenge of one week, in which I can't play any HU games. It's those games I often play to chase my losses. Sometimes I play higher SNG's too, for the same reason, so it might be better to include those in the challenge but the problem with that is that I also play SNG's at the end of my sessions when I don't have enough time to play more MTT's. So let's try it this way and after this one week I will say how it went!

[nightshopper]

It's that time again... Time to quit poker for a little while. The last weeks my mindset has been terrible and most of all, I've been playing 'big' sng's and hu games for many sessions. It has been compulsive behaviour which right now I am not able to end if I keep on playing. As I tried to explain before, it's the most irrational behaviour that I don't seem to be able to control. I can't explain why I can't stop it. It's probably a (destructive) way of handling stress. My wife and I have two children who are diagnosed with autism, which causes a constant feeling of stress at home. It's  not the only explanation for my bad poker habits, but it surely isn't helping. 

I'm not sure how long I will quit playing, but I did withdraw all of my money on Unibet. I'll figure out the bankroll I will start with when I play again, I think it's gonna be €500 max so I will definitely play lower games again.

Thanks for the support everyone who has been reading my blog. It has been helpful but I've come to  a point where quitting for a while is the only solution. Good luck at the tables and see you soon.

 

 

[GR1ZZL3R]

Thanks for the blog @nightshopper a very interesting insight into the stresses of not only poker but outside influences as well. A brave decision so hope things go well for you and your familly and you're back with us before too long. 😔

Edited May 15, 2021 by GR1ZZL3R

[P0kerM0nk]

Good luck with the personal side of things and thanks for keeping a blog here. I think everyone can benefit from a break now and then for whatever reason it might be. There are other more important things in life than poker. Take care!

[IanSimpson]

Well done on taking a break and stifling the bad behaviour. It might not feel it but that in itself is a big victory pal.

[Merenitsu]

@nightshopperRelax and come again. Will wait. Health to your children 🥰

[nightshopper]

So, here we are again! After my mental breakdown I haven't played poker for a week and then I started playing a bit for fun, without BRM or any rules. Thursday I started my new challenge with €500 BR. I'm not calling it a BR challenge though, this one is about discipline more than ever. I've been going to a therapist for more than a year now and yesterday I had a great session, which put me in a great mindset. The therapy she's applying to me is ACT: acceptance and commitment therapy. Originally I started seeing her for my issues with binge eating, but I try to use it for life in general and it can also be applied for the mental game of poker. Or in padel, the raquet sport I'm playing: yesterday my team mate and I were down 1-5 in the first set. My mindset was great: I didn't care about the result, all I wanted to do was play the next point in the best possible way. We actually won six games in a row and won the set with 7-5. But even if we hadn't won it, I would have felt great cause my mindset was great. The goal is to approach poker in the same way.

What has changed for me? Certainly the last years I've put way too much pressure on my game, cause I was focussed on climbing up in stakes in a way I could make money with the game. This won't be a goal anymore, since it just gives me pressure and makes me do stupid stuff. I've told you guys about my compulsive behaviour: playing high HU's and SNG's to win back money fast. Another thing I sometimes did was play +€25 MTT's with money from my bank account. When I lost the money, I was like: I could have gone to the pub and lost the money either way. When I won some money I booked it as a win in my excell file. Way to fool yourself, I know.

I'm not saying I won't make these mistakes ever again, all I'm saying is I will try. I hope I can keep this healthy mindset and if I will, I think it's possible not to fall into the same trap again. So don't wish me luck at the tables, wish me luck in my head 😃

[nightshopper]

Starting BR:  €500 (27/5)

Result:         €-9,76

New BR:   €490,24 (28/5) 

Ticket BR:  €29,00

[GR1ZZL3R]

Glad to see you back @nightshopper 😄 

So glad you're on the right track. 

My biggest problem was self delusion, kidding myself I was probably a winner when in my heart I knew I wasn't, juggling results to make them look better, ignoring the bad ones because "Well that wasn't really a proper pick" and "I would have had more on that" when one won.  I'm much more relaxed about things now, posting every horse pick so I can't fool myself or anyone else. It makes me more relaxed, do your best and results will follow. I'm also focussed on 2-4c cash, nothing more or less, one step at a time. 

Best of luck in your head. 

[HopeYouRebuy]

 Nice to see you again. Be careful with that brain thing, it's pretty sensitive. And best of luck at the tables.

[Rushbie]

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Naltrexone

Just tell the doctor honestly you got issues with eating,drinking,drugs, whatever. Modern docs should know that, it's something that actually works.

[nightshopper]

Hi guys! Half a year ago I disappeared quite abruptly from this forum and from my own blog. You can imagine that's not because my poker went great 😏 Since then I restarted a few times, but the discipline issue kept coming back. So here I am again, ready for a new year and a fresh start. January 1st I start with a €500 bankroll. I will play MTT's with a buy in up to €5, unless I bink a ticket for the higher buy ins. MTT's I will often play are the €1 and €2 Singularities, the €2 Asteroid, the €5 Shooting Star Bounty, the €1 Space Madness Bounty, the €2 Galaxy Omaha and on Saturdays the €5 Stratosphere and the €1 MotherShip Main Event. I will also play some satties and SNG's. And of course I will do my best NOT to play higher buy in events, which I tend to do when I try to chase my losses. Those who followed my blog know that this is the biggest challenge for me. My mental game is my biggest leak, so I'll definitely write about that again. As I wrote before the stress level at home is often very high, since we have two children with autism. It's tough not to bring the stress to the poker tables, but all I can do is try. See you guys in a few days!

[FreedoM]

@nightshopperHey, why can't I send you a PM?

[nightshopper]

2 minutes ago, FreedoM said:

@nightshopperHey, why can't I send you a PM?

Hmmm, I have no idea. Should I change something in settings?

[FreedoM]

4 minutes ago, nightshopper said:

Hmmm, I have no idea. Should I change something in settings?

I have no idea. 🤔

Maybe you have the inbox full?

If not, maybe @Stubbe-Unibet can help?

Edited December 29, 2021 by FreedoM
Halp!

[nightshopper]

Yep, my inbox was full. I emptied it, so it should be solved 😃

[nightshopper]

My first day of the 2022 challenge wasn't great when it comes to results, but at least my mindset was good. In one of the Singularities I can only blame myself for busting. UTG and UTG+1 limped, I raised to 6BB in the SB with QQ. They both call my preflop raise. The flop comes K52 with two diamonds and the UTG player shoves for another 32BB with just 20BB in the pot. I can't really put them on a hand that plays it like that, except for a flush draw. They can have 55 or 22 but I don't think they would donk shove, I also don't see them shoving a Kx hand. I had 31BB left so even if I folded I'd have more than enough chips. I couldn't make the fold and they showed K9o 😒 Very weird play, but then again it's a 2€ buy-in MTT on Unibet. In general I think it's better to fold in this kind of situations cause even if it is a mistake, you still have enough chips to make something happen. Any thoughts on this hand?

I played 11 MTT's with buy-ins between €1 and €5, 2 €1 SNG's and 1 qualifier. My last game of the night was my best one with a 4th place + 1 bounty in a €5 Shooting Star Bounty.

I think I'll play again this evening but I won't be playing too late since tomorrow I get back to work after being 11 days at home. One day down, 364 to go!

Starting BR:         500

Result:              -13,92

New BR:          486,08 

Ticket BR:              3,6

 

 

 

[GR1ZZL3R]

A good mindset is good. 🙂

If you build it (a good mindset) they (good results) will come. 

[P0kerM0nk]

I hope that thing in the picture isn't what I think it is @GR1ZZL3R 🤣🤣

[Yoggiboss]

GL GL dude! Fun with challenge! :)

[nightshopper]

The MTT results haven't been good the last three days, but I should say that I only played seven regular MTT's in those three days. I've been feeling tired in the evenings, which made me don't wanna play very long sessions. So instead of adding more MTT's after busting the first ones, I played some qualifiers and SNG's. Yesterday I bubbled the superqualifier for the €50 Mercury Blue Bounty: that one hurted, cause I've had some good results in the MBB. But I did bink a €50 Supermoon ticket, which gives me a chance to qualify for the big one.

The cash bankroll is going down so far and I'm not gonna lie, it didn't feel good. Certainly cause I had the feeling of getting very unlucky in important spots. So yes, I felt frustrated and angry. But... I'm proud to say I didn't start playing some higher buy-in heads up or SNG games, to win back my losses. Also I'm proud about my game selection and the decision not to play for too long. At the end I one tabled the final table of the €0,5 Sputnik Omaha Nano, which ended in me making the most terrible call ever to bubble that one. I wouldn't have made that call if I wasn't so tired, so that's a shame. Anyway, let's remember the good stuff: no bankroll blow-ups and no long sessions when feeling tired!

Starting BR:    486,08

Result:              -18,90

New BR:          467,18

Ticket BR:         59,00

[nightshopper]

After only 8 days I'm gonna put this challenge on hold. Things went really wrong, again. I'm not gonna play poker for a week and then I will restart with a €100 bankroll. I've been playing way too much lately, so the plan is to bring back the balance. 

If I had written this before I started seeing a psychologist I would have wrote that I blew it, that I failed. But I learned that this isn't about personal failure. There are reasons that this is an issue for me and mentally I am working really hard to deal with it. And I will keep on working hard to do so.

[FreedoM]

7 minutes ago, nightshopper said:

After only 8 days I'm gonna put this challenge on hold. Things went really wrong, again. I'm not gonna play poker for a week and then I will restart with a €100 bankroll. I've been playing way too much lately, so the plan is to bring back the balance. 

If I had written this before I started seeing a psychologist I would have wrote that I blew it, that I failed. But I learned that this isn't about personal failure. There are reasons that this is an issue for me and mentally I am working really hard to deal with it. And I will keep on working hard to do so.

Might be you take it too seriously and feel the pressure to get there overnight. Might help to see it as a game and your main goal should be to enjoy playing and getting better. And what; ever else happens it's just part of it. Enjoy the process. Be the best you can be without any pressure. 🫂